Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh
Surely everyone has heard the phrase "Happiness and suffering lie in the mind". In fact, everything that happens in the world, whether good or bad, happy or sad, worth paying attention to or not, depends on how we perceive and our attitude towards that problem/event. If the mind is not worried, not entangled, always light and happy, we will feel that life is beautiful - that is "happiness". If your mind is always thinking, worrying, worrying, looking at everything negatively, and holding on to sadness, you will be "suffering". Of course, as worldly people, not everyone has the nature of being carefree - not thinking, enjoying the present. But we can learn to think and look at things in a different, more positive and fresh direction.
I came to "Anger" by Thich Nhat Hanh when I encountered some bad things in life. I tend to think a lot, sometimes too much, so I often think and take negative actions, unable to escape. I did things that could make me happier and more comfortable, but it only worked for a short while. So I tried to turn a few pages in "Anger".
“When we are angry, when someone makes us angry, we must return to our body and mind and take care of our anger.”
So how to take care of anger?
“When walking from one corner of a room to another, from one house to another, we must be aware of each step, be aware of our feet contacting the ground, monitor our breathing, monitor whether we are breathing or not. Air flows in and out of the body with each step.
The more you focus on each breath and each step, the more your anger will gradually subside. Just like that, every time you encounter something annoying and your head feels like it's on fire, remember to inhale and exhale about 5-10 times, focusing all your attention on those breaths. Then, use mindful breathing and walking. Anger will gradually subside.
"When we are angry, we suffer." That's right. You're angry, you're upset, you're sad,...all of these things you silently endure alone. Maybe the person you are angry with is also suffering, what will you think when you are the reason that person is suffering? And if the person you're angry at doesn't even feel sad, then why are you angry to make yourself miserable? There are people who, because of anger, hate their whole life. Living like that is a lifetime of suffering.
“If you cannot accept yourself, if you cannot treat yourself with compassion, how can you accept and treat others with compassion?”
After reading the book, I had more positive thoughts and felt somewhat relieved. Anyway, in life, there must be times of sadness and suffering to feel joy and happiness. After going through bad things, we have more motivation to train ourselves to become more perfect.
In fact, dying is easy, living in this world is difficult. The things you encounter today are not necessarily the most terrible, the feelings you endure today are not necessarily the most painful. But then everything will pass. Enjoy the present in the best way, only you can make yourself happy.
“Many people have sought happiness from the outside, but true happiness can only be found from within.”
"Anger" is a book that not only teaches you how to deal with anger, but also introduces basic concepts with a Zen approach. Before, I had heard a lot about Zen but didn't really understand it. Perhaps I will find a few more books by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh to gain a deeper approach.
Of course, there are points in the book that are quite difficult to follow. I think if I could let go of so many things, maybe I would have taken refuge and lived a peaceful life. This depends on each person's way of thinking. I have only read the book once so I can only speak briefly and subjectively, after all this is a book that needs careful study.
