A World of Perfect Feeds
Photo by Daniela Holzer on Unsplash
👍 We chase "LIKES" because we want to feel better, liked, happier, and accepted.
Somewhere along the line, the pursuit becomes a struggle to meet an unseen fakes lives we probably can’t reach.
The more we scroll through perfect feeds and flawless faces, the more we feel behind. The more we try to fix ourselves, the less real we think.
Looking for Perfectionism
Symmetry, success, glow-ups, tidy narrative arcs. Influencers become aspirational characters.
Even when they're "being authentic," the camera is still on and the edit still exists. It's not malicious; it's the mechanics of the medium.
How Influencers Suffer Conformity | Jet van Wijk | TEDxAyala
But it leaves many of us with a nagging thought: if I were just a bit prettier, sharper, richer, wittier, then I'd be happy.
Then I’d be loved. That’s the trap.
Why Likes Aren't Love
The Cost of Chasing the Highlight Reel We're told that if we improve our appearance, intellect, wealth, or humor enough, we'll finally feel whole.
In reality, the finish line is always moving. Every improvement raises the bar. You get brief relief, then the standard shifts.
Gen Z And The Pressure To Be Perfect: Chasing An Illusion In The Digital Age
The cost is anxiety, self-criticism, and a steady sense of not-enoughness. Even long-term therapy can drift into this if the quiet goal becomes "fix me until I'm perfect."
Perfection doesn't produce belonging. Love does.
Becoming "Real" Again
Becoming "Real" happens when you're truly loved — not when you're shiny or flawless, but when someone cares in a way that wears the edges of your life soft.
4 Uncomfortable Truths About *Self-Love* You Don’t Want to Hear
Becoming real isn't painless; it involves scuffs and loosening stitches. But it's beautiful because it's honest. Realness is the opposite of the highlight reel.
It's the family text thread, the late-night dishes, the nervous laughter, the tearful apology, the stubborn hope.
Acceptance First, Then Growth
Social Media Confuses Visibility with Value. Likes aren't love.
Algorithms select for extremes bodies, bank accounts, aesthetics, hot takes and edit out the middle, the messy practice where people actually change.
We do need improvement to live well. But improvement without Acceptance can become self-rejection in disguise. Acceptance without growth turns into stagnation. The art is the balance.
Self-Acceptance and Curiosity | April Herring | TEDxWestminster
Start with Acceptance, saying this is me, today. Name the truth without drama. Acceptance helps you overcome shame, allowing you to think clearly.
From there, choose growth that serves your values, not your image. Ask what matters most, then act in small, consistent steps that align with it.
Measure by meaning, not metrics. Did you move toward connection, contribution, and integrity? No, did you get more views?
Be Grounded
Curate your inputs by following creators who normalize struggle and process, not just outcomes, and quiet the accounts that leave you stuck in envy or body checking.
Add friction to your apps by using timers or keeping them off your home screen, making mindless checking more difficult.
I recommend using an app like Opal to block or limit distracting apps on a schedule so you check them with intention instead of habit.
👀 👉
Also, when you post on social, do it to connect and share something that uplifts others.
If you do, please share about yourself, your life, and your culture, because I am sure whatever you have to share will be authentic and great to read.
And 💡👨💻 post it on BULB so you can earn while helping others and connecting with the whole community. 💡👨💻
Focus on connection, not being the best; strive to be the most supportive person for others, and concentrate on creating rather than competing.
Next Time, You are Scrolling
Ask better questions, not "How do I fix myself?" but "How can I be kind to myself while I learn?" and "What small step serves the life I want?"
Perfection is about control. Love is about presence. You don't need to become perfect to deserve love. Being loved is how we become real.
The influencers' lives look smooth because they're edited.
Your life is not edited, and that's the point.
That’s what makes you real. That’s where happiness lives.
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