Learning..

Oh my reindeer, so many things happened after my last diary. I did stupid things as I always do, and good things also.
I've been avoiding Mongolians recently. They drink a lot, the things they talk about are not interesting at all, and just our vibe doesn't match. Sometimes I pretend I'm laughing at their jokes, but they - are almost never funny to me. And I hate that they reach out to me during exams or about assignments. No need to mention that I can't even look at or hear one of them.

I tried some new things here. I drank many times (but I always have control), went to a nightclub (it was terrible), and spent a night without sleep(I was like a zombie for days after that). Maybe I should experience it early and know how it is so that I won't become so alco- holic when I'm older. I didn't stop studying well while I was hanging out. I learned that it's possible to balance studying and partying.
There were several days that I drank the previous day and went to school with 3 hours of sleep, but I was still getting good grades on exams and finishing assignments on time- - amazing

I would say that now is one of the best times of my life. I don't feel like I'm a loser as I used to in Mongolia." My confidence grew and I became more extroverted. I made friends at school and I don't hesitate to talk to them. I've never known how good feeling is this - the feeling that I belong somewhere and people are nice to me. The feeling that I shouldn't be afraid of feeling lonely in public. International students are cool, smart, funny, and nice. Even though sometimes I can't express myself fully and understand them in English, I like to talk to them. By the way, I'm travelling to Berlin
with 10 foreign friends during Christmas. My first trip to Europe and with friends.

I'm having a little homesick recently. I want to meet my friends and hug them. I want to see my mom. I really miss my home.

There are many problems living in a dormitory - a small room with someone, a shared bathroom, a too small kitchen. I want a cozy home: (On top of this, I'm missing home because the new year is coming. I'm always with family on new year's day, we eat, watch TV, and drink champagne. It will be my first new year's day without family.

After living in Budapest for almost 4 months, I got used to everything here. The transportation, places, weather, and people. I don't want to go back to Mongolia after my graduation. The only thing I worry
about is my mom. I need to take care of her. Surviving in Mongolia is so hard. I want to take her to a better place with healthy conditions and less stress.

I really wanted to leave Mongolia and live independently, and it is happening now. I learned and relearned some things during this time.

Writing for myself:

Never trust a man. Please, for your- self, never. All the boys are fake. It takes soo much time to recognize a person. And you know, you are na- ive and bad at recognizing people. They will only hurt you and make your trust issue bigger and bigger. In the end, you can't trust anyone again.

Catch and release (Taylor's quote). You should know when is the time
to let something or someone go or keep. Losing a toxic thing is actually a win. If you don't like to be with certain people, just leave them. Sometimes you need to say no.

Be yourself. Some people may look cooler than you, but you don't need to imitate them. Create your own coolness. Always be confident and loyal to yourself.

Pay attention. When someone is talking to you, or you're in a math class, try to focus and don't think about other things in your head. You will save so much time if you pay attention to lectures and prac- tices. You will make good decisions if you are aware of what's going on around you.

My journey here is a little adventur- ous with good and bad things, and I'm enjoying it! See you in my new